Ha!

The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe

"When a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the table would crack and Death itself would start working backwards."

Have you read the book?

Have you seen the movie?


You should.
Some quotes from C.S. Lewis:
"Human beings, all over the earth, have this curious idea that they ought to behave in a certain way, and can't really get rid of it."
"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world."
"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world."

Grave Matter

Despite all his mother Cindy's media-courting antics and attention-seeking stunts, Casey Sheehan's grave still has no headstone. Cindy has made up feeble excuses for why she hasn't had her war hero son's grave marked with a proper headstone, although the military would provide one free of charge if requested to do so. I would have thought she'd have a bronze statue of Casey erected on the site. The more I hear about Cindy Sheehan the more I believe she's nuts. To read more details, follow the above link. Oh, and she didn't pay all the funeral costs, either.

Oh, Viggo

Allow me a moment to talk about Viggo...this guy is deep. Did you know he is not only an actor, but also a painter, poet, writer, and avid equestrian? In fact, he purchased the horse he rode in the Lord of the Rings movies, and he also bought Arwen's horse and gave it to the stuntwoman who rode the horse in the movies. He also bought one of the "Hidalgo" horses. Cool.



"You don't have to make something that people call art. Living is an artistic activity, there is an art to getting through the day."
-Viggo Mortensen



"Be kind. It’s worthwhile to make an effort to learn about other people and figure out what you might have in common with them. If you allow yourself to be somewhat curious — and if you get into the habit of doing that—it’s the first step to being open minded… and realizing that your points of view aren’t totally opposite. I don’t think anyone’s are, in the end. It’s just a question of finding out by spending time with them or giving their ideas a chance to be considered." -Viggo again



Here is one of his poems:

Cuttings
The afterthought of chimes
filters in from next door.
I am under the echo, not
listening so much as noticing
it from time to time as
I look over the results
of my landscaping and
weeding from a white
wicker chair.

An errant vine has sprouted
two blue flowers
where it reaches
the base of the lemon tree.
They are beautiful;
I am suspicious.
Are they a diversion,
an entreaty to keep me
from cutting back the vine?
I'll keep the flowers,
put them in a saucer
by your bed.



OK!

Something's fishy about this

In Kenya someone caught a tuna with a verse from the Koran apparently spelled out in its scales. The verse translates as "God is the greatest of all providers."
When I look at the picture, it just looks like a regular old fish to me. I guess I am just not used to a language that looks like wavy lines. Just think of all the "messages" we've missed in the clouds, on pond scum, and in Kool-aid stains on my carpet. Somebody get me a translator!
On a similar note, I recently found some strange pieces of noodles in my soup that looked eerily like letters of the alphabet. In one spoonful, I found the cryptic message, "RVBA STLX," which means "Floss Daily" in Swahili. CREEPY!

Wish I was here...

Check out these beautiful photographs from all over the world.

Our pretty blue planet

You've gotta look at these satellite photos taken of our planet. No, seriously, go look at them now. The website shows them in much greater detail than I can on this page.

Beauty

If you want to see beauty, look at something and then look at it again.

J.R.R. Tolkien

It's a mirage

A stunningly convincing mirage appeared earlier this month off the Eastern coast of China.

Thousands of tourists and local residents witnessed a mirage of high clarity lasting for four hours off the shore of Penglai City in east China’s Shandong Province on Sunday.

Mists rising on the shore created an image of a city, with modern high-rise buildings, broad city streets and bustling cars as well as crowds of people all clearly visible.

Experts said that many mirages have been recorded in Penglai, on the tip of Shandong Peninsula, throughout history, which made it known as a dwelling place of the gods.

They explained that a mirage is formed when moisture in the air becomes warmer than the temperature of sea water, which refracts rays of sunlight to create reflections of the landscape in the sky.

Spooky!

Flat-D

Now we've seen everything.

A company called Flat-D Innovations, Inc. has invented dog thongs complete with charcoal filter to reduce the smell of dog farts.

But Rover isn't the only one who can benefit from the breakthroughs in the field of breaking wind. You, too, can own a fart filter. Available for men and women, in regular and thong-designed. Here are some actual customer testimonials...



“I had become a hermit after a very embarrassing experience I had happen to me. I avoided meetings and made my office off limits to everyone except my personal secretary. After using your product for a few weeks I realized that I would be able to let down the barriers and enjoy life again. I cannot ever thank you enough for how you’ve helped me.”

"What a wonderful product. I can fart and not really have to worry. Great."

"My husband is constantly stinking up the house. I always had to burn candles or spray air freshener to mask the smell. Thanks to your product, his gas smell is taken care of at the source. He was skeptical at first but when I threatened to divorce him if he did not try it, he did and has been happy with the results. Thanks Flat-D."

"It also does a nice job muffling the noise."

"I work very close to people as a computer trainer. Unfortunately I am lactose intolerant but I love my cheese. One day I had a grilled cheese sandwich at lunch, and I paid for it that afternoon. I quickly installed my Flat-D and it greatly reduced the smell and sound of my farts. In the past I was quite embarrassed by the smell and sound and I think the people who came to my classroom gave me poor ratings due to my internal problems. This has been a god-send product."

...And my favorite...

"I dont stink no more thanks to my flatty ds"

Also available: chair pads that will "effectively neutralize groin odor."

Click here to learn more than you ever wanted to know about pooting, from self-proclaimed "Flatulence Guru" Frank Morosky.

Circular Kitchen

Okay, this is way too cool. The circular kitchen rotates and even has a cover that closes around it to hide the whole thing. It has a storage capacity equivalent to that of a large conventional kitchen. You can have all the appliances necessary - refrigerator, dishwasher, microwave, fully integrated coffee machine, ceramic cook top with 2 or 4 cook zones, a built-in microwave/oven-combination and a Range hood.
Go to the company's website to see more pictures and chose your own color scheme (I like the blue).

Rednecks

TOP 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU'RE USING A REDNECK'S COMPUTER...


10. The monitor is up on little blocks.
9. Outgoing faxes have toe-backy stains on them.
8. The six front keys have rotted out.
7. The extra RAM slots have Ford truck parts stored in them.
6. The numeric keypad only goes up to four.
5. Every password is "Bubba."
4. There's a gun rack mounted on the side of the computer.
3. There's a Skoal can used for your beverage coaster.
2. The keyboard is painted in camouflage.
1. The mouse is referred to as the "critter."

More redneck stuff here...

In a HP mood

Here's a website encompassing all things Potter.

Bed Books

A company has come out with books printed sideways so you don't have to struggle to find a comfortable position for your book while lying on your side.
I am not kidding.