Dingbats

Scientific proof that size matters. You must read this.

An old friend of mine might disagree with the findings, but she can't argue with science. Besides, her idea of intelligence differs from mine.

Within every stereotype there is a grain of truth.

Interestingly enough, I recently saw something on TV about bat genitalia. They showed some apparently really stupid bats. Fascinating.

Only click here if you are prepared for a very graphic illustration of an idiotic bat. You have been warned.

Wee Haw..

Tips on Getting More Efficiency from your Women Employees

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was written for male supervisors of women in the workforce during World War II.

1.) Pick young, married women. They usually have more of a sense of responsibility than their unmarried sisters; they're less likely to be flirtatious; they need the work or they wouldn't be doing it; they still have the pep and interest to work hard and to deal with the public efficiently.

2.) When you have to use older women, try to get ones who have worked outside the home at some time in their lives. Older women who have never contacted the public have a hard time adapting themselves and are inclined to be cantankerous and fussy. It's always well to impress upon older women the importance of friendliness and courtesy.

3.) General experience indicates that "husky" girls - those who are just a little on the heavy side - are more even tempered and efficient than their underweight sisters.

4.) Retain a physician to give each woman you hire a special physical examination - one covering female conditions. This step not only protects the property against the possibilities of lawsuit, but reveals whether the employee-to-be has any female weaknesses which would make her mentally or physically unfit for the job.

5.) Give the female employee a definite day-long schedule of duties so that they'll keep busy without bothering the management for instructions every few minutes. Women make excellent workers when they have their jobs set out for them, but they lack initiative in finding work themselves.

6.) Whenever possible, let the female employee change from one job to another at some time during the day. Women are inclined to be less nervous and happier with change.

7.) Give every girl an adequate number of rest periods during the day. You have to make for some allowances for feminine psychology. A girl has more confidence and is more efficient if she can keep her hair tidied, apply fresh lipstick and wash her hands several times a day.

8.) Be tactful when issuing instructions or in making criticisms. Women are often sensitive; they can't shrug off harsh words the way men do. Never ridicule a woman - it breaks her spirit and cuts off her efficiency.

9.) Be reasonably considerate about using strong language around women. Even though a girl's husband or father may swear vociferously, she'll grow to dislike a place of business where she hears too much of this.

10.) Get enough size variety in operator's uniforms so that each girl can have a proper fit. This point can't be stressed too much in keeping women happy.

OOH, the colors!

As my loyal reader (I'm sure there must be one) has no doubt noticed, I've been playing around with the design of this page. I like the way these colors kinda play tricks on your eyes. Some look like they're popping off the screen all 3-D like, and others seem to fade into the background. Kewl!

Brokeback Bleah

My pal sent me some Brokeback Mountain cartoons, and these are the only two that didn't make me want to regurgitate. If you just must see them, e-mail me, but I will not post them here.

New Look

Do you like it?

Chocolate City

New Orleans souvenir shirts

What Simpson are you? Apparently I'm Lisa

I've got a birthday coming up...

What color are these dots?

True.

LOST

Finally, a new episode of Lost will be on tonight. It's really frustrating how the networks will take a hit show and stretch the fresh material out so far that you lose track of the storyline between new episodes. I looked on the website and caught myself back up, and I believe they're gonna do a recap thing tonight, too. Good thing, because all the momentum from the storyline has been blown.
So...will Charlie crack open the Virgin Mary statue? Will there be another "incident" now that Michael has used the computer for communicating with someone? Is it Walt? Will Kate and Sawyer get it on?
For those of you who don't watch Lost, I know this means absolutely nothing to you.

Halloween Costume of the Year, 2005

Obviously the hurricane and the flooding were terrible, but you gotta admit this is a clever re-creation of the guy looting Heinekins in New Orleans after Katrina hit. Bet he won the contest at that party, unless somebody was able to actually get their head up their butt far enough to go as Blanco or Nagin, or the FEMA director (what was his name? I mean, besides Mud?).

GRR

You make me feel like a tiger....RRREEAAWWWRRR!
Only one person in the world got that joke. Hi, Mitsy!

Oh. My. Gosh.

WOMAN FOUND DEAD UNDER PILES OF CLUTTER IN HER HOME
(If I ever go missing, search my office)

A woman in Shelton, Wash., who was reported missing by her husband, was found dead under piles of clutter in their home, where she suffocated to death, according to police. The home was so cluttered that police officers' heads touched the ceiling as they climbed over the clutter.

Authorities found the body of 62-year-old Marie Rose buried under clothes after 10 hours of searching. She reportedly suffered from a condition known as hoarding. Rose's husband believes she fell while looking for the phone in the house this week.

There were so many piles of items that the man did not realize she was dead in the home, and police didn't see the woman until their second search of the home. It was estimated that several tons of debris remained piled up inside the house.




APPLEBEE'S SUED FOR SERVING 5-YEAR-OLD ALCOHOL
(If it had made him sit quietly and eat his food she wouldn't have complained. And what's a 5-year-old doing using a sippy cup?)

A Manhattan mom is suing a local restaurant for allegedly getting her five-year-old drunk.

According to the New York Post, Cynthia Pereles says she ordered an apple juice for her son, Seth at the Applebee's in Battery Park City, but instead the boy was served a Long Island Iced Tea. Pereles tells the Post she only discovered alcohol in Seth's sippy cup when she noticed his eyes glazed over and he began laughing uncontrollably. Pereles says Seth sobered up in the hospital. The suit names both the independently owned restaurant and Applebee's International and seeks more than $75,000 in damages.



ELMO ASKS KIDS, "WHO WANTS TO DIE?"
(Anyone who has to read the Elmo book ten times in a row every day)

A mother in Dallas is one of several parents complaining about a new interactive book for toddlers in which Sesame Street character Elmo asks "who wants to die?" Family members said 16-month-old Miranda Boll's new book, "Potty Time With Elmo," was supposed to teach an interactive lesson using voice commands. However, when the book's buttons are pressed, it reportedly says something it is not supposed to -- "who wants to die?" "It's a sick joke," mother Angela Bolls said. "If it's a joke then it's a bad one, you know? And it's not necessary. It's inappropriate."




RAW MEAT FOUND INSIDE SEALED I-POD PACKAGING
(New from Apple: iMeat)

A 14-year-old girl who received a new Apple iPod opened the sealed box and found raw mystery meat inside, according to a Local 6 News report. Rachel Cambra purchased a new high-tech iPod for her daughter as a gift this week. When she opened the sealed box, the device was missing and in its place was a piece of raw meat, the report said. Cambra said the box was sealed and that it didn't appear to have been tampered with when she brought it home from the Honolulu Wal-Mart where she works. An investigation found that a former employee apparently tampered with a shipment of iPods and put the meat into several packages.




ONE-EYED KITTEN BORN
(Too bad it died; the owner could've made a fortune off it on E-Bay)

Cy, short for Cyclopes, a kitten born with only one eye and no nose, is shown in this photo provided by its owner in Redmond, Oregon, on Wednesday, Dec. 28, 2005. The kitten, a ragdoll breed, which died after living for one day, was one of two in the litter. Its sibling was born normal and healthy.



DEAD WOMAN LEFT IN FRONT OF TV
(They left the TV on? Maybe this was the one viewer Carson Daly thought he had)

A dead woman dressed in white was positioned in a chair in front of a television set for 2 1/2 years because she told her caregiver that she didn't want to be buried and planned to return, the coroner said.
"Don't show my body when I'm dead," Hamilton County Coroner Dr. O'dell Owens said Monday in describing Johannas Pope's wishes. "Don't bury me. I'm coming back."

Pope, 61, died Aug. 29, 2003. Her caretaker and friend, whose name has not been released, left the woman upstairs in the home with the television and air conditioning on while the body slowly decayed and mummified, authorities said. Some family members continued to live downstairs in the house since her death.

Police went to the house last Wednesday after a relative who hadn't seen Pope in 2 1/2 years called them. They found a staircase behind a door blocked by a basket and climbed to the second floor where they found the body. "Standing outside, one could smell death," Owens said.

Owens said he had not determined the cause of death but found no signs of abuse or foul play. Authorities are working to determine whether any crimes were committed, but Owens said the caretaker and family members apparently did not benefit in any way by keeping Pope.

Need a lift?

Can I get a witness?

An Italian man is suing a former seminary schoolmate (now a priest) and the Catholic church itself in the hope of disproving
the existence of Jesus. The avowed athiest admits it will take "a miracle" to win the case.

The Timeline

Have a look at this--it gives you a different perspective of where (or should I say when?) we are:
The Timeline

Are the holidays over yet?

We had a fun holiday with all kinds of activities, including school, scouts, and church, plus family activities (including a surprise birthday party) and visits with friends. Thanks for all the fun! We didn't get Christmas cards out this year, but to all of you HAPPY NEW YEAR and we hope it's your best yet!